


Notes from Hawaii

by slash4femme



Category: NCIS
Genre: Character study of Tim and Hollis, F/M, M/M, lots of stereotypes about Hawaii that probably aren't even vaguely true.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-05-07
Updated: 2015-05-07
Packaged: 2018-03-29 11:26:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,032
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3894589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/slash4femme/pseuds/slash4femme
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tim has been transferred to Hawaii where he is trying to put his life back together.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Notes from Hawaii

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written in 2009. I do not change/edit my older work, just upload it here.

  
Tim can’t pretend it’s not beautiful here. Because it is, just like all of the movies and travel brochures say it is. Clear, blue, sky, yellow sand and blue ocean as far as the eye can see. Beautiful people too, a fact that makes Tim self-conscious; pale and over weight, every time he leaves his house for the first month or so before he gets used to it. His house is another thing too paid by NCIS it’s an honest to God bungalow complete with screened in porch, palm trees in the front yard and view of the beach. The only thing not to love is the fact that it’s almost impossible to keep from tracking sand indoors.

Ok, if he’s being completely honest with himself there are lots of things not to love. He misses the team in DC. Misses Abby so much it hurts him every single day, a deep pain in his chest that won’t go away. She calls him of course every week sometimes twice a week, but it’s not the same. He misses her smile, misses her hugs. He misses Ducky too, misses Ziva, hell he even misses Tony.

The work here is good, slow, and a little boring, but there’s nothing wrong with it. He’s the head technical agent, and he has lesser agents who call him boss and do what ever he tells them to without question. He gets used to wearing short sleeves and no tie to work everyday, gets used to wearing shorts or cargo pants instead of jeans or sweatpants when he gets home. He even gets used to wears sandals, and jethro loves the new house, loves going for walks on the beach everyday.

All in all Tim thinks it could be a lot worse and tries desperately not to think about the life he’s left behind.

He doesn’t recognize her at first. Her hair is down, falling in a long blond wave to almost her waist, and she’s wearing a light blue sundress and sandals. He blinks a couple times, across the small, dark café. Then he realizes, and picks up his smoothie and walks across to the table where she’s sitting.

“Hey”

She blinks up at him for a moment trying to place him then smiles.

“Hey yourself” She indicates with one hand that he should sit at her table so he does. “Timothy McGee right.”

He nods, if feels like forever since they’ve seen each other although he knows it really hasn’t been all that long. He thinks about how much in his life has changed, how much he’s changed and sighs. She arches her eyebrows at him and sits back toying with the straw in her own drink.

“So you here on vacation?”

He shakes his head “no, I work here now.”

Hollis regards him for a long moment, then shakes her head and laughs.

“What?”

“Nothing, just never thought you’d leave D.C. You seemed so settled there, part of the team, part of that family.”

“Yeah, well,” He leans back staring at his smoothie, suddenly not feeling like drinking it, finding it’s sweetness more then cloying. “Things change.”

“Hey.” She reaches out to grasp his hand in one of her large, strong ones. “Why don’t you come over for dinner tomorrow, I can’t cook a lot of stuff, but I’ve learned to make a mean chicken and pineapple.”

He looks down at their hands on the table between the drinks then lets his gaze slide away staring at the cracked plastic tablecloth instead.

“Sure.”

Ex-Coronal Hollis Mann’s bungalow looks a lot like Tim’s own bungalow. Tim realizes this as he stands dressed in flip-flop sandals, cargo pants, and a blue Hawaiian print shirt holding a fruit salad and trying not to feel as ridiculous as he’s sure he looks.Hollis answers the door after his second ring wiping her hands off on a dishcloth and dressed so similarly to him, (cargos, sandals and Hawaiian shirt, hair pulled back in a ponytail) that they both can't help but laugh out loud. She lets him in and he follow her through her little living room into the galley kitchen and puts his fruit salad carefully on the counter. Tim watches Hollis bend gracefully and take the chicken out of the oven.

They set the table and eat dinner, talking mostly about Tim’s job at Pearl Harbor, and how hard it can be adjusting to living in Hawaii after living in Virginia especially since Tim grew up there.Finally they finish and Tim helps wash the dishes, before Hollis takes two bowls and fills them with fruit salad.

“Come on” She picks up the bowls, hands one to Tim before rummaging around on a shelf and pulling out a bottle of whisky and two shot glasses. “It’s too nice a night to be in here. Especially seeing as how we living in Hawaii.”

Tim takes his fruit salad and follows Hollis outside. Hollis’ front yard is grass for a couple feet then dips sharply down turning into beach and then ocean. On the edge before grass becomes sand there are several large rocks, shaded by trees, big enough for them to sit comfortably together without being too close.

“So” Hollis sets the bottle and glasses behind her then digs into her fruit salad, “tell me about why you left Washington.”

Tim sighs, looking down at his fruit salad then back up at Hollis. He bites his lip; it’s been a hellish couple of weeks, couple of months really. Trying to pretend everything is fine, trying to pretend his heart isn’t broken, that this was his idea, and not having anyone to talk to about it. On the other hand, this conversation has the potential of being extremely awkward at best, and down right nasty at worst. He likes Hollis, dinner was nice, and he really wants them to be friends but if he tells her the truth it could all be destroyed.

“I fell in love.” He tells her picking at his fruit and finally putting it down on the rock. “And it didn’t go well.”

She continues to look at him and Tim sighs again and finally settles on the truth. “I fell in love with Jethro, and we . . . but he couldn’t . . .”

He laces his fingers together and stairs down at them wondering if it will ever get easier, wondering how he can say that the man he loved more than anything, when it came right done to it couldn’t love him back. That Gibbs had chosen to live with the shadows of the dead rather then make a new life, with Tim. He doesn’t look up at Hollis afraid of what he might see if he does. He hears her put down her bowl and shift around on the rock and for a moment he thinks she’s going to get up and leave, then to his utter amazement he feels her hand clasp his, and he looks up to see nothing but sympathy reflected in her grey eyes.

“Tim” she says softly “I know.”

And he remembers then that she does. Tim squeezes his eyes shut trying to stem the tears, which are completely uncalled for given how many he’s really shed for the lost possibilities, which drove him to take the job at Pearl Harbor in the first place. He hears Hollis shift around again and opens his eyes to see her bringing out the bottle of whisky and shot glasses. She looks at him sympathetically and Tim thinks he must be showing more of what he’s feeling then he would like.

“Oh Tim” she says again “I know.” Then smiles rather sadly and holds up the bottle, “that’s what I brought this for.”

He tries to grin and takes one of the shot glasses holding it out to her as she feels both of them up. She takes one and raises it.

“To D.C. and all the marvelous people there” she says then throws it back like an ex-Marin. Tim downs his too then winces and coughs, but the burn is good going down, taking his mind off other types of pain. Hollis refills both of their shot glass. “To passed friends” she says a little more seriously this time and they both drink together in unison. She refills and then it’s Tim’s turn.

“To colleges who are gone” He says then grimaces in equal parts from the burn and because of the memories it brings up. Hollis crosses herself then salutes and drinks. Hollis leans back on her elbows on the rock her legs stretched out in front of her and Tim refills for both of them.

“To missed opportunities” Hollis decides and Tim leans back too to rest on his elbows while Hollis pours more whisky.

“To Jethro.”

Tim decides quietly, and they lift their glasses in unison, salute silently and then drink.

“I miss him.” Hollis spins her empty shot glass around on its side on the rock. “Even after all this time, I still miss him. I know,” she sighs and leans back. “I know we weren’t together very long, but he was a good man.” She pours herself another shot.

“Yeah” Tim looks down and rubs the back of his neck“ I miss him so much. I miss hearing his voice, and seeing him smile, I miss him holding me. I just really miss him. He was a good boss, a good man.”

“He has a nice ass too.” Hollis sits up and pours them both drinks while Tim sputter in a fit of shocked laughter. She quirks an eyebrow at him. “Don’t tell me you never noticed”

“No, I noticed” Tim takes one of the shot glasses from her.

“Not that the rest of him wasn’t bed either”

Tim tries hard not to choke on his drink.

“A damn fine man” Hollis nocks her shot back in one smooth motion.

“His hips” Tim decides and Hollis moves to face him on the rock giving him a quizzical look “I always liked him hip” Tim clarifies drinking again “not so much the way they looked as the way he moved them.” Then he realizes what exactly he’s just said and turns bright red, as Hollis throws back her head and laughs.

“Here, here” She raises her now empty glass

“Although I must say I hated the way he’d never tell you when he was going to be home”

Hollis nods “or call if he couldn’t make lunch.”

“Or pick the towels off the bathroom floor.”

“Or bring the coffee cups up from the basement until they were all down there.”

“Or, God forbid, have an actual conversation about his feelings.”

Tim sets down his shot glass and looks out across the beach to the ocean. It’s a beautiful view the kind most people would kill to have from their front lawn. The sun has set and the moon has come up giving off not a lot of light but enough to see by. The sky is so clear here, so very different from Washington, where the city lights and pollution obscure the stars. He can feel the alcohol in his system making him feel warm and disembodied and he knows he’s had enough.

“Why” he says very quietly, very sadly “why do you think we weren’t good enough?”

He behind him he hears Hollis move until he can feel her forehead some to rest against his back, her strong hands against his shoulders.

“I think we were.” She says just as softly “he just couldn’t realize it.”

“Do you think he ever will?”

She moves her head against his back then sits up squeezing his shoulders gently.

“Would you go back to him if he did?”

He twists his head slightly trying to look over his should at her.

“Would you?”

She doesn’t answer and they sit together for a while looking out towards the ocean as a tropical breeze plays through the palms above them.

“Come on.” She says finally “I have a couch you can borrow.”

She gathers up the bottle, bowls and glasses, heading back towards the house, and after a moment longer Tim follows.

 

      


End file.
